紡ぎ

メンタル・イデア・ラボ、AEのスミです。

『紡ぐ(つむぐ)』という言葉がちょっと気になっています。

改めて意味を調べると糸を作ることとありました。

人はいいこと、悪いことを経験する、これは絶対と言ってもいいかもしれません。

しかし悪いこと、ツラいことが続くと、メンタルは弱っていってしまいます。

続いた時にどうするか・・・弱っていくメンタルをどう立て直していくか、人はこれを繰り返して生きていくのだろうと思います。

私も思えばその繰り返しだったように思います。恐らくこれからもそれを繰り返して生きていくのだろうと思います。

そうわかっていても悪いことやツラいことがあったり、続いたりすると、その状況から抜け出せるのだろうか、もうこれで終わってしまうのではないだろうか、と不安になって益々メンタルが弱っていきます。

『幸せ』とはなんだろうか?と、ふと思ってしまうこともあります。

いろいろな思いが巡ります。自分が嫌になったりもします。

そういう気持ちを抱えながら生きるということが『人が生きる』ということなのかもしれません。わかっているつもりでも、日常を過ごしているとつい忘れてしまい、感情的になったり、不満をぶつけたり、不安の渦に引き込まれ、もうダメだと思ってしまうものです。

人生というと偉そうで、抽象的で堅苦しく、漠然としています。そして口にすることなどおこがましい。哲学的でどこか自分のことから離れたことのようにすら思います。

『自分の生を紡ぐ』

言い換えると、こういう表現になるのかな、と今は思います。紡ぐというと営みを感じます。さらに自分のこととして意識しやすい。

いいことも悪いことも、ツラいことも苦しいことも、自分の生を紡いでいる瞬間瞬間なんだ、と。紡いだ先はどうなるのか、それはわかりません。だからこそ紡ぎ続けるしかないのだと思っています。

『紡ぐ』という言葉は、とりあえず主体的に自分を生きてみようかな、と思える不思議な言葉だと感じました。

<運営会社:Jiyuuku Inc.

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