【続】他者の時間とスキルを搾取するのが平気な人たちの考察

メンタル・イデア・ラボ、AEのスミです。

前回本城が標題のタイトルで人のスキルを搾取することが平気な人たちについて書いていました。今回はその続編として、そういう人はなぜタダでやってもらおうとするのかを考えてみたいと思います。

まず表面的な部分では『友達』というところに甘えがあるのかもしれないと考えました。『友達なんだからいいよね?』という甘え。甘えなのか彼らの中の常識なのか、それはわかりません。

例えば、友達が飲食店をオープンしたとします。身近にそういう友達がいる人は結構いると思います。一度は必ずと言っていいほど顔を出しますよね。その時『タダで飲み食いしよう』『タダで飲み食いさせてくれる』と思って行くでしょうか?店を開いた人が自分の友達がわざわざ時間を割いて顔を出してくれたから、何らかのサービスをしてくれることはあるかもしれません。でもそれを予め当然と思って行くでしょうか。

大概の人は「いや申し訳ないよ、ちゃんと払うよ」になると思います。私も何度かそういうことがありましたが、皆ちゃんと払っていました。むしろご祝儀も兼ねてお釣りはいらないよ、とまで言っていた友達もいました。

一方で本城のような心理士や美容師、医師、ネイリスト、カメラマン、デザイナーなどという人に依頼する時は、『友達』をいいことにタダでやってもらおうとする人がいます。私からすれば、それは友達の悪用にしか見えません。友達に依頼する根底には“信頼できる人”ということがあります。しかし、その信頼を“悪用”している自分に気づいていないのだと思います。

心理士や医師、ネイリスト、美容師、飲食店を開いた料理人もそれぞれのフィールドでプロフェッショナルとして活躍している人たちで、そういう人が友達にいることはとても心強いことです。何かあったら相談したくなる気持ちも理解できます。そして仕事を依頼するとなれば、当然対価を支払うことが道義であり誠意ではないか、と思うのです。

個別には「お前の頼みならタダいいよ」と言ってくれる場合もあるでしょう。しかしそれはあくまでも個別的なことで、大前提は友達であれ依頼する側は対価を支払うことではないでしょうか。クルマの貸し借りでもガソリン代程度は払いませんか?

「お前との関係だろ、水くさいことはいいよ」と言うのは依頼された側で、「水くさいこと言わずにタダで頼むよ」と依頼する側が言ってはいけないし、その友達のスキルや技術を利用しているだけです。

友達を本当に大切に思うなら、きちんと対価を支払うことのほうが人としてまっとうではないでしょうか。

一方、表面的な部分では『友達だからという甘え』に対して、根深い部分では日本人の『美徳』が関係しているかもしれないと考えます。無意識な部分でもあるのでわかりにくいかもしれません。

依頼する側は何かに困っているから、それを解決できる“信頼している”友達を頼るわけですが、「困っている友達からカネを取るのか?」「困っているんだから善意でやってやれよ」という無言の世論とも言うべき日本人の『美徳』というやつが『タダで』という発想を安易に、間違った形で招くのだと思います。

困っている友達からカネを取るのか?・・・多分事情を聞けばその時は取らないことがあるかもしれません。しかし『出世払いでいいよ』とか『カネができた時でいいよ』と言います。冗談かはさておき、言葉の上では『払ってね』であり『タダではないよ』ということです。

『タダではないよ』という言葉の裏にあるのは、思うに困っている友達への最大の敬意ではないかと思うのです。タダを別の言葉で言い換えると『施し』になるのではないでしょうか。『施し』は恵みを与えることです。ちょっと見方を変えれば上から目線の行為です。宗教が施しと言っていいのは、人間が崇め奉り人智を超えた存在である仏様、神様からの恵みだからです。

人が人に施し(タダ)となると、施す相手を非常に愚弄した行為になりかねません。だからこそ『タダではない』のです。タダではないことにする意味は立場を対等に保ち、相手の自尊心も傷つけないある種の知恵だと思うのです。

友達からタダという施しを受けた瞬間、その友達よりあなたの立場は下になり、もう友達関係とは呼べなくなる気がします。

そう考えると、安易に『タダでやってもらおう』とすることは、自分で自分を貶め、友達との関係に上下を作り、友達関係を破壊する愚かな行為と言えます。

そう考えると、本当に『タダ』ほど怖いものはありませんね(笑)

<運営会社:Jiyuuku Inc.

「【続】他者の時間とスキルを搾取するのが平気な人たちの考察」への229件のフィードバック

  1. Wow, marvelous weblog structure! How lengthy
    have you ever been running a blog for? you made running a blog look easy.

    The overall glance of your site is magnificent, as neatly as the content!
    You can see similar here sklep internetowy

  2. When someone writes an paragraph he/she retains the
    idea of a user in his/her mind that how a user can understand it.
    So that’s why this post is outstdanding. Thanks!
    I saw similar here: Dobry sklep

  3. you’re really a good webmaster. The site loading speed is
    incredible. It seems that you are doing any distinctive trick.
    Also, The contents are masterwork. you have done a great job on this matter!
    I saw similar here: Dobry sklep

  4. Hi there! Do you know if they make any plugins to help with SEO?

    I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some
    targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good success.

    If you know of any please share. Many thanks! You can read similar blog here: E-commerce

  5. Hey there! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with Search Engine Optimization? I’m trying to get my
    site to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good results.

    If you know of any please share. Cheers! You can read similar article here:
    Backlink Portfolio

  6. Howdy! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with SEO?
    I’m trying to get my site to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing
    very good results. If you know of any please share.
    Many thanks! You can read similar article here: Backlinks List

  7. Wow, fantastic blog layout!
    How lengthy have you ever been running a blog for?

    you make blogging look easy. The entire glance of your web site is great,
    let alone the content! I saw similar here prev next and
    those was wrote by Dean97.

  8. Wow, incredible weblog format!
    How long have you been blogging for? you made blogging glance easy.

    The entire glance of your website is excellent, let
    alone the content material! I read similar here prev next and
    those was wrote by Patsy79.

  9. Hello! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist
    with Search Engine Optimization? I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very
    good success. If you know of any please share. Thanks!
    You can read similar art here: All escape rooms

  10. I will right away take hold of your rss feed as I can’t to find your e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you have any? Please allow me know in order that I may just subscribe. Thanks!

  11. Good article! We will be linking to this particularly great article on our site. Keep up the great writing.

  12. Hi, you used to write excellent articles, but the last several posts have been kinda boring… I miss your super writing. Past several posts are just a little out of track!

  13. Hello there! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with SEO?
    I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords
    but I’m not seeing very good gains. If you know of any please share.
    Appreciate it! I saw similar article here: blogexpander.com

  14. May I simply say what a relief to uncover someone who really understands what they are talking about on the web. You definitely realize how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More people ought to look at this and understand this side of the story. I was surprised that you aren’t more popular because you most certainly have the gift.

  15. It’s tough to come across knowledgeable individuals on this matter, but you sound like you know what you are speaking about! Thanks

  16. Excellent website you have here but I was curious if you knew of any message boards that cover the same topics talked about in this article? I’d really love to be a part of group where I can get advice from other knowledgeable people that share the same interest. If you have any recommendations, please let me know. Cheers!

  17. You created some decent points there. I looked on the internet for any problem and discovered most individuals will go along with with your website.

  18. Beging with the entire wales well before just about any planking. Our own wales can easily compilation of calculated forums those thickness analysts could be the similar to some of the shell planking along with more significant damage so that they project after dark planking. planking

  19. Everything is very open with a precise clarification of the issues. It was truly informative. Your website is useful. Thank you for sharing.

  20. This will be the correct weblog for hopes to be made aware of this topic. You recognize a great deal its practically challenging to argue along with you (not too I really would want…HaHa). You definitely put a different spin on the topic thats been revealed for a long time. Fantastic stuff, just fantastic!

  21. Hi, you used to write excellent posts, but the last several posts have been kinda boring… I miss your great posts. Past few posts are just a little bit out of track!

  22. I’m curious to find out what blog platform you’re working with? I’m having some small security issues with my latest website and I’d like to find something more safe. Do you have any recommendations?

  23. An impressive share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a co-worker who has been doing a little research on this. And he in fact bought me lunch because I discovered it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending time to talk about this matter here on your blog.

  24. Very effectively written information. Will probably be invaluable to anyone who usess it, including myself. Keep up the good work – for positive i’ll check out extra posts.

  25. Saved! Found your self on google and I am glad I was able to. Great site you ought to get plenty of traffic here’ like to own a blog along these lines.

  26. I like the valuable info you provide in your articles. I’ll bookmark your weblog and check again here frequently. I am quite certain I’ll learn many new stuff right here! Good luck for the next! xrumer

  27. of course like your web-site however you need to test the spelling on quite a few of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very bothersome to tell the reality on the other hand I will surely come again again.

  28. Simply want to point out your write-up is impressive. The actual clarity in your submit is just breathtaking and i also can easily presume you are an expert on this discipline. Nicely together with your agreement let me grab your own rss to maintain to date using incoming post. Cheers a thousand and please keep up the particular fantastic function.

  29. Howdy are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own. Do you require any html coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!

  30. Thanks for another excellent post. Where else could anybody get that type of information in such an ideal way of writing? I’ve a presentation next week, and I am on the look for such information.

  31. You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be really something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complex and very broad for me. I am looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it! xrumer

  32. It is my very first time that i have a look at this website. I recently came across countless interesting information in your weblog notably this discussion. Among the numerous responses on your writings, I guess I’m not the only one experiencing all of the excitement right here!

  33. Hmm is anyone else encountering problems with the pictures on this blog loading? I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any responses would be greatly appreciated.

  34. I’ll immediately grab your rss as I can’t find your email subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you have any? Kindly let me know so that I could subscribe. Thanks.

  35. Wow that was strange. I just wrote an very long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyway, just wanted to say excellent blog!

  36. This site really has all the information I wanted about this subject and didn’t know who to ask.

  37. Nice post. I learn something totally new and challenging on blogs I stumbleupon on a daily basis. It’s always interesting to read through articles from other authors and practice a little something from other web sites.

  38. Thank you for sharing excellent informations. Your web site is so cool. I am impressed by the details that you have on this blog. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles. You, my friend, ROCK! I found simply the information I already searched all over the place and simply couldn’t come across. What an ideal web-site.

  39. I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this website. I really hope to see the same high-grade content from you later on as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own site now 😉

  40. Hi! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after looking at many of the articles I realized it’s new to me. Regardless, I’m definitely pleased I discovered it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back often!

  41. Good site! I truly love how it is easy on my eyes and the data are well written. I am wondering how I could be notified whenever a new post has been made. I’ve subscribed to your feed which must do the trick! Have a great day!

  42. After study a handful of the blog articles on your own website now, i genuinely as if your method of blogging. I bookmarked it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon. Pls take a look at my web site at the same time and tell me what you think.

  43. there are many new movies to watch this month, i would be going to the cinema and video rental store again**

  44. Aw, this was an exceptionally nice post. Taking the time and actual effort to generate a superb article… but what can I say… I hesitate a whole lot and don’t manage to get anything done.

  45. Everything is very open with a very clear clarification of the challenges. It was definitely informative. Your site is very useful. Thanks for sharing!

  46. I blog often and I genuinely appreciate your content. Your article has truly peaked my interest. I’m going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new information about once a week. I subscribed to your Feed too.

  47. This site definitely has all of the information and facts I needed concerning this subject and didn’t know who to ask.

  48. This page definitely has all of the info I needed concerning this subject and didn’t know who to ask.

  49. Hello! I just would like to give a enormous thumbs up for the excellent information you’ve here on this post. I will likely be coming back to your weblog for much more soon.

  50. Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one! It’s on a entirely different subject but it has pretty much the same page layout and design. Great choice of colors!

  51. Remarkable page as well as convenient in order to comprehend justification. Exactly how can We start gaining concur in order to put up part from the guide during my coming bulletin? Getting good credit score for you the actual journalist as well as backlink towards the websites won’t be considered a challenge.

  52. hey all, I was simply checking out this blog and I actually admire the idea of the article, and don’t have anything to do, so if anybody want to to have an engrossing convo about it, please contact me on AIM, my identify is heather smith

  53. I savor, lead to I found exactly what I used to be having a look for. You’ve ended my four day long hunt! God Bless you man. Have a nice day. Bye

  54. hey there and thanks to your info – I have definitely picked up anything new from right here. I did then again experience several technical issues the usage of this web site, since I skilled to reload the site lots of instances previous to I may just get it to load correctly. I had been pondering if your web host is OK? Not that I am complaining, but sluggish loading instances occasions will sometimes impact your placement in google and could damage your high-quality score if advertising and with Adwords. Well I’m including this RSS to my email and can glance out for much extra of your respective exciting content. Make sure you update this once more soon..

  55. The when I read a weblog, I really hope so it doesnt disappoint me as much as brussels. What i’m saying is, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought youd have something intriguing to state. All I hear can be a bunch of whining about something you could fix if you werent too busy interested in attention.

  56. I think other site proprietors should take this web site as an model – very clean and wonderful style and design, in addition to the content. You’re an expert in this area!

  57. This post offered fantastic insight. I truly appreciated going through it. The information is extremely arranged and easy to comprehend.

  58. This post is extremely informative. I genuinely enjoyed perusing it. The content is very structured and straightforward to comprehend.

  59. Useful information. Fortunate me I found your website by chance, and I’m shocked why this accident did not came about earlier! I bookmarked it.

  60. Adored the information in this article. It’s highly detailed and filled with beneficial insights. Fantastic effort!

  61. The the next occasion I read a weblog, Lets hope so it doesnt disappoint me about this place. After all, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought youd have something interesting to express. All I hear can be a few whining about something you could fix in the event you werent too busy looking for attention.

  62. Truly liked reading this article. It’s highly articulate and full of helpful details. Many thanks for providing this.

  63. This post is wonderful! Packed with helpful information and very clear. Thank you for providing this.

  64. This site is often a walk-through you discover the data it suited you concerning this and didn’t know who ought to. Glimpse here, and you’ll definitely discover it.

  65. The elegance of those blogging engines and CMS platforms will be the lack of limitations and ease of manipulation that permits builders to implement rich subject material and ‘skin’ the website in such a way that with really tiny effort one particular would by no means discover what it truly is making the internet site tick all with out limiting content material and effectiveness.

  66. This could be the right weblog for anyone who wishes to learn about this topic. You recognize a whole lot its practically hard to argue on hand (not that I actually would want…HaHa). You certainly put the latest spin on the topic thats been discussing for a long time. Fantastic stuff, just fantastic!

  67. you are really a excellent webmaster. The website loading speed is incredible. It sort of feels that you are doing any unique trick. Moreover, The contents are masterwork. you have performed a fantastic activity on this topic!

  68. That is the appropriate blog for anybody who needs to find out about this topic. You understand a lot its almost onerous to argue with you (not that I really would want aHa). You positively put a new spin on a subject thats been written about for years. Great stuff, just great!

  69. Wonderful entry. It’s highly clear and full of useful insight. Many thanks for providing this content.

  70. It’s in point of fact a nice and helpful piece of information. I am glad that you shared this helpful information with us. Please keep us up to date like this. Thank you for sharing.

  71. Adored the information in this article. It’s extremely detailed and packed with helpful details. Great work!

  72. Wonderful post. It’s very clear and full of beneficial insight. Many thanks for offering this post.

  73. I discovered your blog site on google and check a few of your early posts. Proceed to keep up the excellent operate. I just extra up your RSS feed to my MSN News Reader. In search of ahead to studying extra from you in a while!…

  74. Excellent entry. I value the effort you put in to share such valuable details. It was concise and very enlightening.

  75. Nha cai Wi88 la san choi game ca cuoc the thao uy tin hang dau moi ra mat nam 2024 tai thi truong Viet Nam cung nhu chau A. La thuong hieu moi cua nha cai W88 noi tieng hon 30 nam, Wi88 cung so huu giao dien bat mat va keo cuoc da dang, thu hut dong dao cuoc thu tham gia moi ngay. website: https://wi88.soccer/

  76. Hello, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam responses? If so how do you protect against it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any help is very much appreciated.

  77. Genuinely appreciated perusing this entry. It’s highly clear and packed with useful details. Many thanks for offering this.

  78. You produced some decent points there. I looked on-line for any problem and found most individuals will go in conjunction with with your site.

  79. Nice post. I learn some thing tougher on diverse blogs everyday. Most commonly it is stimulating to learn content using their company writers and use a little from their site. I’d prefer to apply certain together with the content on my small blog regardless of whether you do not mind. Natually I’ll offer you a link on the web weblog. Many thanks for sharing.

  80. Simply desire to say your article is as astonishing. The clarity in your post is just great and i can assume you are an expert on this subject. Fine with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the gratifying work.

  81. The very core of your writing whilst appearing reasonable at first, did not settle well with me after some time. Somewhere within the sentences you actually managed to make me a believer but only for a while. I however have got a problem with your jumps in logic and one might do well to fill in those breaks. In the event that you can accomplish that, I could certainly end up being amazed.

  82. i get my art books from barnes and noble that come or amazon, they have some great discount coupons too”

  83. This is wonderful. I learned plenty from reading it. The details is highly educational and arranged.

  84. Have you ever wondered who posts some of this stuff that you come across? Honestly the internet used to be like a different place, although it seems to be changing for the better. What are your thoughts?

  85. Thank you for making my own students have access to your site post. Your kindness is greatly appreciated. I’ve some ongoing assignments and I wanted them to assist me with it. The only way they were able to achieve that was carry out some homework on the internet so as to help make my work faster. They came across your site as well as content on it, particularly this blog post, really helped them to get good conclusions on those things we needed to perform. Of course, I will continue to really visit the site for brand new updates on this top and other issues of curiosity.

  86. I love your blog post.. excellent shades & concept. Does a person style this web site yourself or have a person hire an attorney to make it work available for you? Plz respond seeing that I!|m looking to style by myself website as well as would want to realize wherever you received this via. many thanks

  87. Excellent post. It’s very well-written and packed with valuable details. Thank you for offering this information.

  88. I am usually to blogging and i genuinely appreciate your posts. This content has really peaks my interest. I’m going to bookmark your site and maintain checking for first time info.

  89. Generally I do not read post on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very compelled me to take a look at and do so! Your writing style has been surprised me. Thank you, very nice article.

  90. Hi! Do you know if they make any plugins to help with SEO? I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good results. If you know of any please share. Thank you!

  91. Genuinely enjoyed going through this article. It’s highly well-written and packed with valuable insight. Thank you for offering this.

  92. Excellent post. It’s extremely well-written and filled with useful details. Many thanks for offering this content.

  93. This is actually serious, You’re a particularly professional blogger. I have signed up with your feed furthermore watch for enjoying all of your incredible write-ups. In addition, I’ve got shared your webpage with our social networks.

  94. Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive read something like this before. So nice to search out anyone with some authentic ideas on this subject. realy thank you for starting this up. this website is something that’s needed on the internet, somebody with a little bit originality. useful job for bringing one thing new to the internet!

  95. This article is wonderful. I learned tons from going through it. The information is highly educational and arranged.

  96. This is fantastic. I picked up a lot from perusing it. The information is highly educational and structured.

  97. Excellent article. It’s highly well-written and packed with valuable information. Thank you for providing this post.

  98. This post provided fantastic details. I genuinely enjoyed reading it. This information is extremely structured and easy to follow.

  99. This post is highly educational. I genuinely valued going through it. The details is very arranged and straightforward to comprehend.

  100. Excellent article. It’s very well-written and packed with useful insight. Many thanks for providing this content.

  101. Wonderful post. It’s highly well-written and packed with beneficial information. Thanks for providing this content.

  102. This post gave excellent details. I genuinely enjoyed reading it. This post is very well-organized and straightforward to follow.

  103. Terrific entry. It’s extremely articulate and full of useful insight. Thank you for providing this information.

  104. Adored this post. It’s very comprehensive and filled with helpful information. Many thanks for sharing such helpful content.

  105. This post offered me tons of helpful information. I really liked the method you explained the content. Great job!

  106. Really appreciated perusing this article. It’s highly articulate and filled with useful details. Thank you for providing this.

  107. This article is great. I gained a lot from reading it. The content is very educational and arranged.

  108. Really appreciated going through this post. It’s highly clear and filled with valuable information. Thank you for providing this.

  109. Genuinely appreciated reading this post. It’s extremely well-written and full of valuable details. Many thanks for sharing this.

  110. Adored the information in this post. It’s extremely well-researched and packed with helpful information. Excellent job!

コメントを残す

メールアドレスが公開されることはありません。 が付いている欄は必須項目です